Answers:

Dear Pretty Screwed Up

Ahh, the games women will play. This is a classic "have your cake and eat it, too" situation, but let's look at it a few ways:

She Knows Him Better

What are you talking about? Eric doesn't even exist.

First, there's nothing inherently wrong with her choosing to date Eric. You and Sara had just met, and had very little time to get to know each other. It's possible that her attraction for her friend Eric had been years in the making, and she saw it as her opportunity to finally pursue Eric. He had the major advantage of already knowing her for a while, so don't take it too personally that she chose to pursue someone she knew better.

Putting You in a Difficult Position

What do you mean not fair? They'd only known each other a couple of hours. He moves too fast!

But, she's not playing entirely fair. By asking your permission, she put you in an extremely difficult position: give the green light for her to pursue the other guy, and you suffer; protest, and you're to blame for her and the other guy not working out. It's an unfair situation, and a complete and total mindgame. That should have been your first red flag.

She's Downright Selfish

I agree – she's using him.

But wait... there's more! On top of this, she wants you to wait for her while she pursues a relationship?!? That's downright selfish on her part, and I would recommend for the sake of your heart and mind, don't allow her to walk all over you.

I Was in the Same Position

Of course, I know that giving advice is easier than following it, because I allowed myself to be in the same position once, even though I understood at the time how completely degrading it was. I warn you now: it tore me apart more and more with each passing day.

Tell Her You Won't Play by Her Rules

I agree – he should tell her how he feels.

I suggest you make it a mission to talk to her, and let her know that you like her, that you'd be interested in pursuing something with her, but that it can't be completely by her rules. Be honest with her, and communicate your feelings to her. Ask her to see how unfair this situation is for you.

If she can't see how you feel, then forget it, there's a lot more women out there deserving of a guy like you.

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